The Haunted Vagina, by Carlton Mellick, III (2011)

Carlton Mellick III is at the foremost of the new “Bizarro” fiction genre, and “The Haunted Vagina” is certainly bizarre.

It’s also hysterically funny in parts, oddly touching in others, and really, a damned good read…for some people.

Steve works in a call center, and one day he meets Stacy on a bus. Stacy is tall and Thai. The two become a couple, and Stacy moves in with Steve. Everything is wonderful, until Steve notices voices emanating from somewhere. Gradually, they grow louder. Then he realizes Stacy’s vagina is haunted. Not even so much haunted, as being home to a completely different world.

One night, Stacy forces Steve to investigate further. And just as Alice fell down the rabbit hole, Steve falls down…um…a different sort of tunnel, until he plummets into the strange world inside Stacy’s vagina. What he finds there amazes him, to the point where he’s no longer sure he wants to leave.

This novella blew me away. It’s a super-fast read, and it comes off almost like a verbal graphic novel. The blend of real-life and fantasy works beautifully, and the characters’ behaviors are perfectly comical in parts.

I have to admit: I bought this book, because a Facebook friend of mine posted the cover on her page. She also posted the link to Amazon. I saw it was real, and immediately bought it.

I’m glad she posted this cover, because it led me to this book, one of the most fun reading experiences I’ve had in a long time. Bizarro world, I’ll be back.